Holidays Can Be the Hardest Time
Living with Long Covid when routine disappears and energy becomes uncertain
I look forward to holiday periods, when the schools are out, and my wife is too, as much of her work is in schools. It is a chance to spend time together and for the pace of life to slow a little, away from school runs and the relentless rhythm of daily tasks.
But it also comes with its own challenges.
During a normal working week, I have a set routine. I wake at the same time each day, write in the morning, and aim to complete whatever tasks I can in the afternoon. Evenings are usually for catching up with family and, importantly, rest.
Rest is not optional for me. It is part of how I function.
After each article or task, I have to stop and recover so that my energy levels do not drop too far. If they do, I pay for it the next day. The joy of post-exertional malaise.
Because of this, I have to plan my week carefully. I need to know how much energy I am using, and when. If I get it right, I have enough left for the things that bring me joy. If I get it wrong, I can do very little and end up on the sofa for hours, stuck in a crash and feeling guilty for what I have not done.
This is why holiday periods can feel both joyful and exhausting.
Everyone is at home. Plans are made. There are opportunities to spend time together with close family and extended family. All of that matters to me. It brings real joy.
At the same time, it becomes much harder to manage my energy. In truth, it becomes almost impossible.
What often follows is a kind of boom and bust cycle. I push a little too far one day, then feel the effects the next. I find myself constantly tired, and quietly calculating how today’s activity might shape tomorrow. Even that constant awareness is tiring in itself.
By the end of the break, I am usually grateful for the time we have had, hoping I have managed to be present without completely crashing.
There is some good news. Oxygen therapy has raised my baseline slightly, which means I can do a little more than before. The challenge now is learning where the new limits are without overstepping them.
If you are living with Long Covid, you may recognise this pattern. The unpredictability can be deeply frustrating. Even when you think you have found a balance, it can shift overnight.
That is part of the reason I have not recorded a podcast over the past couple of weeks. The fatigue has been heavier, and I have had to move into what I think of as survival mode. For me, that means getting through the day as steadily as I can and prioritising rest wherever possible.
The podcast will return soon. Thank you for your patience.
Whatever you are facing at the moment, please know you are not alone. And as always, if you need to reach out, you can email or message me.
Paul
Life with Long Covid is more than a few articles; it is also:
A community which you can find at www.lifewithlongcovid.co.uk
A podcast which you can access through the website or through Apple and Spotify, just search for ‘Life with Long Covid’.
I have also produced a short book that details some of my podcasts in short, easily digestible chapters. You can read it when you have the energy. It’s available on Amazon here.
Sales of the book help cover the costs of the podcast and website. You can subscribe to receive the latest articles and episodes in your email inbox. This is free, but you can also pay monthly or annually to receive it. To the people who feel able to support me financially, I am very grateful.